Disillusioned fool

YOU DON'T KNOW MY PAST, SO DON'T TALK, FORYOU DON'T KNOW SHIT.

BUT I KNOW. I KNOW ABOUT YOU. I know all about you, alright. You're a scandalous, malicious bastard. You hurt my friend (worse, you've hurt how many other girls), you hurt me too. But I'm different, I am NOT going to let you get away with it, I am going to hurt you back too, by tenfold. But that is letting you off lightly.

You know who you are. I'm not going to name names, I'm giving you one last shred of your dignity. Preserve it well, before I strip it all to pieces, because I can. Don't underestimate me. You've came up with stories about me, but no one is believing (and will never believe) them, y'know? No one is on your side. Karma, it's called karma, baby. You hurt, then you get hurt.

You are a poor excuse of a man. You are not even a man. A man don't make woman, or girls, cry. Don't hurt them. Don't confuse them. Don't make them wait forever. But you did, you did them all. You are ... inhumane, you are a fucked up joke of a life.

There are those who love to play games, any game. And then there are those who love to play too much. You belong to the latter, you play too much and you not just play with the girl, you play with their feelings, you play with their hearts, and you play with just about everything and before you leave, you make sure you've completely destroyed your 'game', or 'pawn'. Because that's how heartless you are.

And even then, that's not enough, that's not enough for you, goddamnit. Completely destroying them is not enough, that's not enough FUN. So you make them want you, need you. Think of you. Miss you till the very thought of you drives one to insanity. And not just miss you, but miss your voice, your touch, your eyes, your lips, your everything. Then you reject them out flat. Their pain, tears, hurt, agony, suffering are your drug, your motivation to keep living, isn't that so? No? Then why do you keep doing that?

Such a disappointment, isn't it, now that they are sick of playing the fool, sick of playing by your rules, sick of being hopelessly devoted to you, sick of it all.

And you, you're the one suffering now. I'm not going to waste any more words on you. You're lucky that your 'pawns' are all so forgiving, else the consequences would not be good, for I'll give you hell.

To my girlfriend, be strong. You have to be strong for yourself. You have to know you're a good person (and a wonderful girlfriend!). And just because of this, don't end up disbelieving in love. Just know this: love is worth fighting for, but you can't be the only one fighting. At times, they need to fight for you. If they don't, you have to realize what you gave them was waaaaay more than they were willing to give you, and that alone is a commandable feat. Don't settle for anything less than you deserve. :)

And ... everyday that you don't speak to him is another day you don't need him, and as you slowly stop missing him, you WILL realize that he wasn't that important anyway! ;)

Think about it this way. This person that you 'love' is the reason behind all your pain. Things aren't the same anymore. You constantly see yourself striving to maintain a perfect relationship (which is already screwed, btw). You no longer trust him because his words continously contradict his actions. You feel this unbearable pain everywhere, pulsing through your body, but you keep on saying, "Screw it, the pain is worth it all because in the end, I'm still with him." So you try your best to trust him, but for some reasons, you can't. Whenever he's out (without you), you have millions of ideas clustered in the back of your mind. You worry too much, you're paranoid about what he's doing, who's he going out with. You are wary of his girl-friends, and jealous whenever he mentions them.

You're not in love with him.

You're just infatuated with love. So infatuated, you've isolated yourself from everyone and everything you love to hold on to this love, which isn't working out. Ask yourself: is it really worth all the trouble and sacrifice, all for just this one guy who really don't deserve it at all, not even one teeny weeny bit?

I hope you've learnt, I seriously hope you do. And now, before you find love again, find yourself. I'm not going to help you the next time. You've been hurt once, it's his fault. You've been hurt twice? It's your fault. Don't go back to him alright. Don't sway to his words. He's a cheating liar, a scumbag. You deserve better.